Dash and his mystery bump

yo..........

so i havnt been speaking on this much, but i have had a bit of a medical issue as of late..........

about a year and half ago, i started having pain in my right jaw....inability to open my mouth and talk shit all the way, headaches bla bla lifes tough get a helment......right

well, i went to a couple urgent cares, a couple denists and finally an oral surgeon, who hipped me that i should see an ENT.........

well sounds great, but i dont have fucking insurance thanks to this wonderful country and its ass healthcare system..........

but i called up the ENT that was refered to me at UCLA SM.......and they said just to see dude was 1400 bucks.........i cant and will not afford that........so i said to the lady "what would you do if you didnt have insurance".........

she said go to UCLA MEDICAL CENTER torrance...........

Now, i been to country facilities when i was shot and basically it wasnt the best experience ever, fucking graff in the elevators, handcuffed inmates in the next bed you get the picture.

but i was in pain so i went to the urgent care and they gave me a referal to the dudes at the ENT dept.......(this is key cause the oral surgeon that o.g went to would have taken 2 months), with the referal from urgent care i was in 1 week.........

now the interesting part.........

the area that was giving me pain was whats called the parotid gland.......a big fucking gland that produces saliva and does a bunch of other shit i guess, but it was acting the fuck up...........

possible causes for my symtopms sorta leaned to what they call a stone blocking the duct.........basically a calcified stone get stuck in the bowling alley to your mouth and all kinda bad shit happens

next visit they felt some hard mass at the edge of my jaw by the ear..........that aint so good.........any mass could be a grip of shit, and none of it good.........could be a abcess could be cancerous tumor could be just a tumor..........hahaha arnold pops into my head of course "its not a tumor"..........hahhhahah

anyways, UCLA ENT fucking rocks..........they kinda fucked up on giving me 3 CT scans in a row when they should have been doing the MRI's but whatever..........finally got the MRI..........in a big ass trailor btw

had to come back for results and sure enough...............4 cm tumor of the parotid gland...........thats not so hot..........but even doe iam having pain they wanted to see what it was, only way to do that.............FNA..........CT guided fine needle aspiration..........yep its gonna suck as bad as it sounds ladies.......

went in, iam on like week 6 by now............but whatever got the FNA and that shit hurt like a mother fucker..........even with the dope and extra dope and signing waivers for even more dope, i still felt it.........

basically what they do is put a grid on your face mark it with a pen, then do the CT scan, then they start puting this "FINE" needle into your face slowly stopping to reguide by doing more CT images........takes about 30 mintues.........in out pokie pokie and then yoru done..........

NOW this part sucks.........waiting for the results.........and yall know me, i do research, and there is a bunch of shit it can be........15 kinda tumors, abcesses, this that the other pathalogy bla bla bla.........its a brain fuck via wiki.........

But whatever the brain is a powerful thing and i kinda resigned myself to expect the worst, cause with the pain the prognosis, didnt look that hot, all the shit i read said you got pain you kind fucked...........and of course the life expendency is maybe 20 years out...........not really enough for the kid, i expect to live to 1000.........but hey thats life get a helment........right

well thursday i went in and its pleomorphic adenomas.........the most common form of benign tumor like 84 percent of em.........whooooooooo.......for now.........the FNA aint 100 percent and its a big ass tumor so ya know grabbing cells even from different levels is dicey..........they told me really there is no wayto know until they yank the lil fuck out, which is exactly what i been reading........fucking wiki

so now its oct 24, and i had to do some blood work to make shure i aint go the koodies and i go into get results of that and set a date for a the "excision"......another word for take the fucker out of there via surgery..........

so it is what it is....but i wanted to put this up cause , doing my reserach nobody was really putting it down to what the experinece was "really like".........

its a nail biting scary fuck fest that takes some balls to get thru, but thanks to Fran, my boy TOM and the super pro cats at UCLA medical center torance ENT.......iam gonna pull it.........

the surgery is go in, get put out, they have to take the whole fucking parotid gland out with the tumor and watch the facial nervers that run thru the shit and which have been getting stretched causing the kid some serious fuck you pain.........then spend the night and go home to probably some facial weaknesss and maybe some sly stallone type shit for a week or two.............

Bad things bout the surgery which aint so hot............doc told me there is a chance that the facial nerve can get clipped or strtched out bad enough to keep my right eye permantly open for a while, i was fucking with em and saying "yea whatever i'll just put some duct tape on that shit".......and to my surprise "yea acutally thats exactly what you'll do" fuckkkkkkkkkkkkhahahhah.........

crazy shit ............

anyway that was long as fuck...........but thats what it is..............
be glad it aint your ass.........but hey thats the point of this blog, somebody always got it worst than you and you always got it worst than the next cat right...........

anyway part 2..........peace
Dash.........